Episode 15 - How to feed these tiny humans
[00:00:00] Hey, my name is Patricia Ciavarello and I am obsessed with all things motherhood and helping you keep calm in the chaos of motherhood and life's unexpected moments. I am a mom of twins with a doctorate in business who's world fell apart and had to pick myself up piece by piece. I am not an expert, but I have totally been there, and I am so far from perfect, but definitely not afraid to get real and vulnerable.
I teach you the secrets to motherhood and life I wish someone told me, because as much as we wish there was, nobody hands you a mommy manual. So pull up a seat, get comfy and get ready for me to spill my secrets. This is Real Mom Truths Nobody Tells You.
I am so grateful that you are tuned into this episode of Real Mom Truths Nobody Tells You.
If you've ever tried to feed tiny humans, you already know what I'm going to say, right? Because it is hard work. I mean, no doubt about it. If you're fortunate enough to have the world's best eater that eats everything that's put on their plate, then you have won the lottery my friends, because I know that many moms struggle with feeding these tiny human beings and myself included right. I remember actually when my twins were younger, like right after newborn stage, like when they started eating purees and somewhat solids, they were actually like pretty good eaters.
And I got so excited. I'm like, wow, I won the [00:02:00] lottery. Right. These kids eat great. And they liked anything. And then toddler time came and oh boy was that fun, especially since I had twins and they both had opposite appetites. It's so funny. Like I would put literally meat balls and potatoes on the plates and one would eat the potatoes first.
And one would eat the meatballs first, like they're so opposite in every way. You can't even make it up. But I remember. When they were really younger, I was like really excited. I'm like, wow, they're going to be great eaters. And then once toddler time came, they just became like super picky.
I mean, it was almost like a, a revolving door in the kitchen. I mean, I tried everything and I made everything and, and. It was just so frustrating to spend all this time and all this effort on things that, you know, they would just give me like a really hard time over. And thankfully I found recipes that they really like.
And actually, if you go to realmomtruths.com, I'm going to post them for you. They're my favorite recipes actually for babies and moms. Enjoy and bona petite. But I remember like in the thick of it, it was like, oh my gosh. I mean, we would sit there forever just trying to get them to take one bite. And it was just like, I mean, if you have one child, that's enough of a battle.
Right. And then if you have have twins or multiple children, it's like double the battle. And sometimes it's just like, oh, I dunno if I have the fight in me today, I'm really tired. I do not want to fight over this one stem of broccoli or whatever it is that you're trying to get them to eat. Right. But I think ultimately this calls for a bigger [00:04:00] conversation.
And I think that as moms absolutely, you know, we have to make the best decisions that we think are best for our children. Whether that be for their health, for their nutrition, right. We always try and make the best choices and that's great, but this, this need for almost like perfection, you know, they have to be eating all the right things or they have to be on, you know, this, this and this, and they can't have that.
And you know, have all these different food groups on every single plate. And yes, I'm not saying any of that is not true. Absolutely. But at the end of the day, you need to give yourself some grace, right? You need to give yourself some grace because sometimes they are going to eat it, and sometimes they're not. And rather than sit there and bang your head on the kitchen cabinet as to why you spend so much time making it and it's all on the floor and you probably ended up eating it yourself at the kitchen counter, right?
Give yourself some grace because you know what, pat yourself on the back for making them something really awesome. And maybe they didn't try it and yeah, that stinks. But you did it, you did it out of love for them. And you know, maybe they'll try it the 10th time or the 15th time or the 20th time. And I know it's frustrating, but first you got to give yourself some grace and then you gotta be consistent and just keep introducing new things to them.
And eventually one day, one beautiful day, they'll turn around and they'll eat it. Then you'll be like the happiest mom in the world. Right? But even if they don't eat it, I don't want you to beat yourself up over, you know, [00:06:00] the pressures of, you know, feeding them perfectly because, well, first it's a lot of work to feed them.
Right. And I say them because I have twins, I'm just used to saying them, but generally speaking kids, family, right. It's a lot of work. It's two, three meals a day and it's you know, washing and cooking and prepping and cleaning and everything that goes along with that. And, you know, sometimes it's thankless work that, that people don't say, wow, mom, thanks for the meal.
You know, they're just like, I don't like that. Why did you make this? You know, kids can be ruthless, right. And at the end of the day, maybe you feel defeated. Maybe you feel like down on yourself about it, but. Know that everything you do, every choice you make is okay. And if it's not the perfect plate, that's okay.
You know, they're not going to die of starvation. You're going to feed them. They're going to eat right. When they're hungry, they're going to eat. And you know, if it's not what you intended them to eat at that meal, or they didn't try it that time. That's okay. Maybe they'll try it the next. And just having the strength and the patience to just say, all right, you know what?
We're going to try again next time and, and not like spinning into anger or frustration about it, because look, it's going to happen. Right. There's going to be meals that you make, that kids are going to refuse to eat. And. That's okay. And like I said, I'm sharing some of my favorite recipes with you. Feel free to getthem at realmomtruths.com. Sometimes I, even just to save time, I batch cook and that's for the babies. And for [00:08:00] me, if there's something that I really like to eat, but I know the kids won't eat it or my, my husband won't eat it, I'll make a big batch on Sunday and I'll freeze half of it.
So that way, maybe on days, I don't feel like cooking it's there in the freezer for me. And I'll do the same thing for the kids. Like, oh, I have this recipe in there for muffins and I'll just like batch and make a bunch of them and I'll wrap them in parchment paper and freeze them. Wala breakfast for the morning, right?
It just saves a little time and a little energy. So that way maybe when you're at that high chair, you know, trying to get them to try that new thing or whatever, maybe have a little bit more energy because you already have dinner prepped or their breakfast prepped then, you know, you can even use, you know, leftover dinner for lunch, right? So you're not making three meals a day. So I tried to include tips that I think would, that I've just used in my daily life with my twins that just made life a little bit easier. So some recipes and some tips to just not have to stand at the kitchen counter all day long and fill time in your day to do the stuff that you've love and, and the stuff that's fun.
I'll never forget. There was this one day I was giving them, oh, what was it? I think it was, yep. It was cereal. And I turned my back from one second and I actually have a picture to prove this. The biggest meltdown you could see in a picture with cereal. And I turned my back for one second and my daughter, she, I don't know, flipped the plate, threw the plate, something along those lines.
And I turn around and there's milk and cereal everywhere. And I mean, everywhere, not just on her high [00:10:00] chair, not just on our table, but in her hair, on the floor. Like you name it. And a lot of times, at least in my case, maybe in yours too, if one child is set off, that sets off the other child, the now all of a sudden this two screaming cereal babies.
Right. And I remember just turning around and going, oh my God, like what just happened? How long is this going to take me to clean up? Did she even eat any of it or is it all in the floor? And you just it's moments like that, where you just feel like so defeated, but I tell you this with complete transparency and honesty, it happens to all of us, all of us.
And there are days where we're just we don't have the fight in us and we can't clean up milk off the floor one more time, or you know, that in combination with the toys everywhere. And it just becomes all consuming, especially if you're tired and you didn't get enough sleep and you know, you haven't showered yet.
And maybe you didn't even brush your teeth yet. And you know, when you've had one of those days and they can be tough. They could be really tough and sometimes you just have to turn around and laugh. And that's exactly what I did in that moment. I, as defeated as I felt and as frustrated as I felt, I couldn't help but grab my phone and take a picture because it was so hilarious.
Like the picture of it was so hilarious. I mean, I knew that one day looking back, I would truly be hysterical laughing at this picture, even if it didn't feel like that in this moment, I knew looking back and I do, I look at that picture now and I'm like, oh my God, that was a day. That was a [00:12:00] day. And I laugh because you know what, that's part of motherhood is taking those days and not letting it break you.
Right. Those days where you feel like you can't clean up one more high chair or one more sink of dishes, or make that one more meal and you're just so tired.
Take a moment and just embrace the moment for what it is. Right. And know that, you know, they're all going to be years down the line, where you look back and you're going to say, oh man, you know what? I really wish when they were little, remember those days, remember those days when they used to spill their cereal all over the floor and the cereal would be stuck in her hair.
Remember those days? Yeah. There's going to be days where you wish for that cereal to be stuck in her hair and the milk to be on the floor. I already do. I look at those pictures and I'm like, wow, there's so little. You know, and they grow up so fast and I'm not minimizing how hard it is to really, you know, prep meals for your family and try and make good decisions and the shopping and the recipes and all that.
I mean, I personally, especially in the recipes that I share, I try and keep it simple and give tips to make it last.. So you're not like. In the kitchen slaving away morning, afternoon, and night. Because that, to me, there's more to life than kitchen. Right? I want to be on the floor, playing with my kids out, you know, doing something, watching something funny, playing a game or, maybe I just need time for me.
I don't want to be in the kitchen all day. I just don't. I like to cook, but I mean, I don't like to be a short order cook. Right? So [00:14:00] I included little tips, little tricks can help you just get a little time back so that you can do the things you love. And I'll never forget another time. My son, he was eating yogurt and I had this bright idea that I was going to let him use his hands. Right. Cause at the time he didn't know how to use a spoon yet. I'm like, oh, I'm just going to let him use his hands and actually have a picture to prove this too. I'm laughing, even thinking about it. He looked like, I don't even know a marshmallow.
He had yogurt everywhere. And he was trying like wholeheartedly to like scoop it in his mouth. And I don't even know what came upon me to allow him to use his hand. I think I was having like a fun mommy moment. Like, yeah. Let him use his hands. It'd be fun, right? No, it was not fun because it was everywhere. Right.
But I tell you right now that picture is like one of my favorite pictures, because his hair's all slicked back and he looks like he just came out of a movie scene, but he's got this ridiculous yogurt everywhere and his fingers all over his face. And he has this like serious look on his face. Like I just caught him in like the worst act possible.
And you know what, we cleaned it up and moved on, you know? But I cherish those moments because those pictures, those moments, although they might seem, you know, tough at the time and oh my God, look at this mess you have to clean up and you know, there's yogurt everywhere or rice. Forget it don't even get me started on rice.
Rice goes everywhere. Right. But you know what, there will be moments where you look back and you're like, oh man, remember when you used to clean up all the rice or remember when he had that yogurt [00:16:00] face in the picture, or remember when he tried a lemon and made that funny face, like there, those are the moments you are going to miss and wish you had back.
So in those moments where you have no more strength, where you feel like you just can't clean up one more thing, or you can't cook one more thing because you know, they're not going to eat it. And you're so frustrated by it. I want you to give yourself some grace and know that, you know what, maybe they won't eat it.
Maybe they'll have yogurt or all over their face. Maybe the cereal and milk will be all over the floor, but you're doing a darn good job, a really good job. And I want you to take a moment and pat yourself on the back and be really proud of yourself because I know, as every mother does, it's hard work, and sometimes it's tiring and sometimes you're running on empty, but you know what?
You are doing a darn good job. And if nobody else has told you that, I want to be the one to tell you that you are doing an amazing job and whether they eat it and whether they don't it's ok. And you should be darn proud of yourself for it because nobody can love them like mommy does. Right. And the moments that you can take to really step into that and love yourself for everything that you're doing for this amazing family and whether it works out the way you thought or whether it doesn't or whether they eat it or whether they don't or whether you're beating yourself up over every single decision you make, whether that be about nutrition or anything else about their [00:18:00] life. I want you to know you're doing a darn good job.
And if nobody else has said it to you, I'm proud of you. So I want you to give yourself some grace and I want you to hang in there and I want you to stay connected. And I want you to be okay if it's not perfect. And I want you to really love the moment that you're in, whether it's their cereal on the floor, whether it's yogurt on the face, allow yourself to be frustrated, allow yourself to be tired, allow yourself for all those things.
But at the end of the day, I want you to cherish those moments because those moments are the moments that you will look back on and cherish forever. And you know what? There will be a day. There will be a day where they're like, mom, can you make me that special meal you always make? And you will do it with love and delight because you love your children. So until then, until that moment happens, hang tight. Let that cereal milk spill on the floor. It's okay. Let that yogurt go all over the face. It's all right. Try to do the best you can with what you got and that is the best thing that you can do for your family, because you know what, not every day is going to be perfect.
Not every meal is going to be perfect. Not every situation with kids is going to be perfect, but you know what, through it all, through the good, through the bad, through the hard, through the easy, through it all. [00:20:00] You're an amazing mom. And I want you to know that.
As always, I promise to be here for you and serve you and cheer you on every step of the way and spill all the secrets of motherhood and life I wish someone told me. Thank you so much for listening to this episode of Real Mom Truths Nobody Tells You podcast. Until next time, keep on celebrating you, because you, my friend, you are so worth it.
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